Disclaimer - DC and WB own them.

Future fic, Clex, humour. Rated R. Many thanks to Saf and nel! :)

I hadn't planned on writing anything else today, but then the opening line for this jumped into my head and...well, here it is.

Feedback would be luuuurvely.

*

The first time they realised Clark could freeze things with his breath, Clark had been sucking Lex's cock.

Lex didn't remember much about the actual incident besides the pain, but that was mostly put down to the shock. He knew Clark had flown him to the nearest hospital, and he could only imagine how hysterical Clark must have been - as Superman trying to explain why Lex Luthor's cock was frozen solid.

It was just as well Lex hadn't really been aware of what'd been going on.

The problem had been fixed eventually, with Superman making judicious use of his heat vision. Nonetheless it'd scared the shit out of both of them, and Clark's mouth hadn't gone anywhere near Lex's body for a long time. Not until they knew for sure Clark had learned how to control it.

Sometimes, even now, Lex still made Clark practise on cucumbers.

Though these days it was more for the visual than anything else.

*

The first time Clark's floating really began to take off (and Lex hated himself for that pun), Lex had fallen asleep on top of him. Rather than just float above the bed like he used to, however, Clark took to floating around the room in his sleep.

Of course Lex only found out when he shifted in his sleep, fell off Clark, and ended up ruining his new PC.

Sometimes he swore he could still feel the keyboard keys embedded in his ass.

*

The first time he called Martha for advice, she wasn't there.

"She's gone into town," Jonathan explained. "Anything I can help you with?"

Sitting behind his desk at LexCorp, Lex pondered the wisdom of discussing this with Clark's father. "Mr Kent...how did you handle it when Clark developed new abilities?"

There was a surprised breath on the other end of the line, and Lex suddenly realised Clark hadn't told his parents about any of his new powers yet. Shit.

"Well, Lex, we just took it one step at a time. Slowly but surely, until he was able to control whatever the new ability was."

Pretty much what Lex had been doing himself. The Kent's had been just as much in the dark as he was. "Any particular advice you can give?"

"Yeah," Jonathan said roughly, "don't get him horny."

Even though he took his advice, Lex had nightmares about Jonathan saying that word for the next three days.

*

The first time they'd discovered Clark's ability to supersuck, Clark had fortunately been nowhere near Lex's groin.

He had, however, been paying particular attention to Lex's toes at the time and one screaming Lex, one broken toe, and a frantic flight to the hospital later, Lex emerged limping from the building.

"I'm really, really sorry," Clark said for what actually was the hundredth time.

As Lex hobbled along, he thought it was just as well he healed quickly, and decided it was further proof of their destiny that he of all people had ended up as Clark's lover.

*

The first time Lex saw Clark in the Superman outfit, he laughed straight for two hours. He'd known it was coming, had seen the designs Martha had drawn up, had seen the costume before Clark had put it on, but even so...

Nothing had quite prepared him for seeing Clark actually wearing it.

Once the humour faded, Lex's paranoia took over and he vowed he was going to do everything in his power to make sure that no one ever found out that Clark Kent and Superman were the same person.

There was no way in hell anyone was ever going to find out he was fucking a man who dressed that badly.

*

The first time Clark's kiss had resulted in Lex losing the memories of an entire week, Lex quite obviously remembered very little about it. In fact he'd gone about his life as normal for a few hours, only truly realising something was wrong when a meeting he went to attend had already happened. When he actually paid attention to his desk calendar, he immediately moved to the sofa in his office to lie down, and asked his secretary to call Clark.

When they eventually figured out what had happened, Clark wouldn't kiss him again for a very long time. Lex, however, was learning, and knew by now that if Clark was aware of his ability then he could control it, even if he didn't know exactly how he was able to do that. As far as Lex was concerned it was all instinct.

In bed a week later, Lex gave Clark no choice - he kissed him, and this time when he forgot everything it was for an entirely different reason.

*

The first time Lex said "I love you", Clark had been in the middle of organising the laundry. Lex had people who could take care of it of course, but Clark liked to take care of it sometimes, claiming it kept him 'more real' (Lex really was going to have to do something about Clark's abuse of the English language).

Looking up from the laundry he'd dumped on the bed - Lex made a mental note to make sure the covers were changed later - Clark smiled brightly. "And this is news how?"

Lex considered feeling insulted but then suddenly, against all probability, Clark was right there, kissing him. And though Lex was almost certain Clark was still holding a pair of dirty socks, he decided this alien thing wasn't so bad after all.

~FINIS

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