*

 

They fucked before they even left the Jeep - although the crown got in the way and had to be taken off.

In bed in the loft, Justin climbed on top of him, pinning Brian's arms to the mattress. "So," he said casually, deceptively, "why'd you stop that guy from blowing you?"

Brian pretended to struggle, and could easily have freed himself if he'd really been trying.

He wasn't. "You know why."

"Tell me anyway," Justin got why Brian had wanted to get his dick sucked - first time back at Babylon, thinking about drinking, falling into old routines - and though it'd upset him, having time to think about it more made him realise that the fact that Brian had stopped at all was far more interesting. When he'd first heard, old issues - or, if he were honest, issues that'd never really been resolved - had flared up, overwhelming everything.

Now, he realised, there were things he could be asking Brian.

Giving up all pretense, Brian freed himself and flipped them both over until he was laying on top of him. Pinning Justin's arms, this time, he glared down at him. "I've told you before, Sunshine - don't push too hard."

"It's the only way to get anywhere with you," he retorted, pondering his next move. He couldn't break Brian's hold on his arms, but...smirking, he opened his legs wider, wrapped them around Brian's waist and started squeezing. Not hard enough to do any damage, but definitely hard enough to be uncomfortable. "You love people who fight with you," he said, watching as Brian tried not to wince, "who question you, make you think. Make you work for it. Because you can't just be happy," Justin continued, squeezing harder, "you have to earn it."

Cursing, Brian released his arms and tried to sit up. Realising Justin wasn't about to let him escape, he reached back and touched his legs. "Let me out."

"No."

"Justin."

"Tell me."

"*Justin*."

"Tell me."

"It's you!" he ranted. "It's fucking *you*, okay? It hasn't been anyone *but* you for months. I saw the guy, and he was hot, and he wanted to blow me. End of story."

There was a small part of Justin that let out an internal 'yippee' at some of that, but expressing it would've ruined the mood he was going for. "And you stopped him because..."

Leaning back onto him fully, Brian held his arms down again. "Because it's *you*," he hissed. "You want monogamy, Sunshine? I can't and won't promise that. We're guys - we fuck. And sometimes I'm gonna fuck someone else. But it has nothing to do with you, and I won't do it in front of you. Now," he demanded, "let me the fuck go."

It wasn't monogamy. It wasn't everything he'd dreamed of. But it was everything Brian could give.

Justin let him go.

Rolling off of Justin, then the bed, Brian stomped out of the bedroom.

Sitting up himself, Justin ran a hand over his hair - reminding himself again that he needed to get a trim. Brian's bare feet thudded about the loft for a while, and then Justin heard the chink of his cigarette lighter. Coming out of the bedroom himself, he found Brian sprawled out on the sofa, smoking.

Sitting next to him, Justin nudged him with his shoulder.

Brian stared at him. "Don't even *try* to be cute. After tonight, we both know that's a big fucking lie."

"What?" Justin asked, "I can't have more than one personality trait?"

"No," he insisted, taking a drag. "You have exactly one personality trait, and that's 'annoying the fuck out of me'."

Smiling half-heartedly, Justin didn't say anything else for a while - just watched and waited as Brian smoked the cigarette down to nothing, mostly staring at the King of Babylon crown resting on the coffee table.

"Come on," he said, after Brian had crushed out the smoke, "let's go to bed."

Brian looked at him. "I'm still pissed at you."

"I know."

Pushing himself to his feet, he started moving towards the bathroom. "This doesn't change anything."

Justin went with him. "Of course it doesn't."

They cleaned - and brushed - in silence, staring at each other in the bathroom mirror, and when they climbed into bed they didn't touch at all.

Brian flicked off the light, and didn't turn back towards him.

Oddly it didn't really bother Justin, because he *knew* now that everything was going to be all right. If Brian really didn't plan on keeping him around he would've kicked him out already, or told him to go fuck himself. They'd work it out. Whatever drama they got tangled up in, they always did.

Snuggling into the covers, Justin moved closer to Brian.

Sighing heavily, Brian rolled over and shifted until Justin could rest his head on his shoulder.

"Thanks," Justin said quietly.

"Whatever," he grunted. "Just don't fucking drool on me."

*

The phone woke them the next morning - Justin was starting to hate when that happened, pulling the covers over his head and letting Brian deal with it.

The bed shifted and Brian's voice could be heard perfectly after he picked up the phone. It became clear almost immediately that it was Deb and she was pissed at Brian, although Justin couldn't figure out why until Brian said something about them forgetting to check their messages when they got home. She must've called last night before they reached the loft, but what about? Frowning, he didn't move until Brian started sounding genuinely concerned about someone, asking if 'he' was all right.

Throwing back the covers, Justin sat up and aimed the frown at Brian. Brian just gave him a look that told him to wait.

Wanting to do something other than just sitting there, Justin got out of bed and pulled a pair of sweats and a t-shirt out of a drawer. Quickly getting dressed, he kept listening in to Brian's side of the conversation as he headed towards the kitchen to start the coffee. He kept hearing tantalising clues, like, "I wouldn't have been able to get to the bank last night anyway," and "Where the fuck did Blake get five grand?"

After the coffee machine was running he started working on some toast, and by the time Brian had ended the call and managed to get partially dressed, the toast popped up.

"So what happened?" Justin asked immediately, plopping one of the slices onto a small plate in front of Brian.

Leaning against the opposite side of the counter, Brian sighed. "Vic got arrested for indecent exposure yesterday. Some plain-clothes cop said he propositioned him in a public washroom."

Of all the things Justin might have imagined, that one didn't even come close. "That's bullshit! Vic would never do anything like that!"

Nodding, Brian yawned and rubbed a hand over his face. "He got bailed out last night - five grand." Jesus. Five thousand dollars? "He called Deb and she came to Babylon looking for me, but by then we'd already left. They tried calling my cell but it was switched off, and when they called here no one answered." Shit, she must have only just missed them. They'd probably still been fucking in the Jeep when she called the loft. "Blake got a 'friend' to put up the money - which should make paying them back extremely interesting," he shook his head. "Apparently Mel thinks the cops just wanna make life hard for a fag. Wouldn't surprise me," he snorted.

Justin was appalled. Vic was one of the people who'd always been there for him. When his dad kicked him out, when he moved out of Brian's and into Deb's - and ended up crying his eyes out all over Vic. Christ, Vic had been more of a father to him than his own shitty dad. "We have to go and see him."

Hesitating, Brian eyed him. "Knowing Vic, he won't want any visitors."

"I won't be there as a visitor," Justin pointed out. "Technically I live there, and I haven't been back for a while. I just want to go and see my very good friends, Vic and Deb." This loophole was pretty handy.

Brian managed a laugh. "He won't believe that for one fucking second. But, what the fuck?" he stared at Justin, seemingly deliberately. "Sometimes a man needs to know when to accept help."

Caught off guard, Justin found himself smiling stupidly at the implication before remembering Vic was in trouble.

"Okay," Brian continued, turning away, "let's shower, get dressed, and get the hell out of here."

Neither one of them touched the toast or coffee.

During the ride to Deb's, it struck Justin how *normal* things were this morning. Last night before he fell asleep, he'd assumed there'd be some kind of 'conversation' when they woke up, even if Brian didn't like talking about things. Either way, Brian didn't seem extra-defensive, wasn't behaving like an asshole, and when they parked near Deb's Justin found himself turning towards him. "About last night..."

Taking the key out of the ignition, Brian turned towards him, too. "Don't tell me you're about to apologise. Don't go soft on me, Sunshine."

"No," Justin shook his head with a brief grin, "I'm not apologising. But...I could've handled it better."

"I don't have any problem with the way you handle things," he leered.

"Brian..."

Sighing, Brian pursed his lips together. "Look. You got pissed at me. I got pissed at you. You gave a particularly impressive drama queen impression. I...said some stuff," he hesitated. "If I have to do this 'relationship' crap - which I seem to be doomed to - at least you help keep it interesting."

Justin didn't get to say anything to that, because Brian immediately got out of the car. And anyway, their relationship couldn't always be a priority.

Vic wasn't pleased to see them, sighing as he opened the door. "Can't I be left alone for five minutes?"

"I'm just here to get some of my stuff," Justin lied, walking in - and pausing when he realised Vic already had guests. A lot of guests. Ted, Blake, Emmett, Michael, Mel, Linds and Gus were all there, mostly talking and looking over sheets of paper in the living room. Mel was talking to someone on the phone.

Wow.

Closing the door, Vic turned towards Brian. "I thought I could've at least counted on you to leave me alone."

"Vic," Brian replied grimly, placing a hand on his shoulder, "you've lived with Justin."

Thinking about it for a moment, Vic nodded. "Good point."

Justin was going to tell them to fuck off, but decided not to - especially as he was suddenly attacked by an incoming Debbie.

"Sunshine!"

"Urf," he replied, not having much choice but to hug her back. "Hey, Deb."

"Oh, I can't tell you have much your support means! That you're even here!" Pulling back, she sniffed at him. "We're all gonna fight this, and we're gonna show those assholes that they can't do this to my little brother just because he's gay."

"That's exactly what we're gonna do," he agreed, earning a kiss on the cheek.

"I'll make you some waffles!" she declared, releasing him to give Brian a hug too before practially running into the kitchen.

Brian and Vic had moved closer to the door, obviously to talk privately. Although Justin had come there expressly to see Vic he left them alone, walking towards the group who'd settled in around the living room. "Hey, guys." No one looked up, but most of them did return the greeting. They had to be trying to figure out a way to help Vic. "Any luck?"

"No," Mel snapped, ending her phone call. "Or," she corrected, glancing around to make sure Deb and Vic hadn't heard, "not so far. I'm gonna start investigating for a precedent in this kind of thing - see if this particular cop has done it before."

"Well, if you need any help, just let me know."

"Thanks, Justin," she smiled, obviously tired, and then glanced at the rest of group, huddled together and bearing a strange similarity to a football scrimmage. "Although it's feeling a little like too many cooks as it is."

Brian appeared next to him then, drawling close to his ear, "You know, in an attempt to changed the subject, Vic just wished me luck at the Atlas Awards on Wednesday night. Any idea how he found out about that?"

Oops. Brian had very specifically not told anyone else after he'd opened the nomination letter. "Hmm. How strange."

"Twat," Brian retorted, gently pinching his ass. "Does anyone else know?"

"You think they would've shut up about it if they did?"

"Good point."

"Oh, Mel!" Deb exclaimed, rushing back into the living room and handing Justin a glass of milk. Frowning, Justin took the milk as everyone turned to look at her. "I just thought - I should call Senator Baxter! I mean, I don't actually know if she'll be able to help, but she's campaigned for gay rights in the past and she definitely helped Sunshine out." Shit, that *was* a good idea.

"That's a great idea, Deb," Mel agreed. "Whatever happens, it's always good to have a Senator in your back pocket."

Pleased, Deb grinned and headed for the phone in the kitchen. "I'll try getting a message to her right-"

"Deb," Vic interrupted, and everyone turned or looked to see him standing by the stairs. "Everyone. I...I appreciate how much you all want to fight for me, and your utter belief that I didn't do anything wrong. It means more to me than you'll ever know. But..." he sighed. "I can't do it. I can't go through this. So I'm pleading guilty."

 

Vic's decision caused an uproar. They all began talking at once but, unsurprisingly, Deb's voice was loudest of all.

"But you didn't do anything wrong!" she screeched, moving towards him. "You should be doing everything you can to clear your name!"

"I'm not *you*, Sis!" he yelled, an act that made everyone shut up. Looking around at all of them, he spoke again. "I'm old. And I'm tired. And I'm sick. And I love all of you, but *none* of you knows what that feels like. I have no intention of sitting there in court as their lawyer does everything he can to humiliate me, to prove that I'm a pervert. I won't put myself through that that," he insisted. "Mel's already told me that I won't go to jail for this. I'll plead guilty, take whatever punishment they give me, and get quietly on with my life."

Emmett spoke, taking a step closer. "As a registered sex offender." Vic winced. Em didn't let up. "You see, Mel shared that little bit of information with us, too. You didn't do a fucking thing, but you'll be known as a registered sex offender for the rest of your life. And people will find out," Em stared at him, completely without compassion. "They always do. And they'll talk - twist things. Soon you'll turn into that creepy old man who molested a kid."

Taking a step back, Vic lifted his chin. "I've made my decision. I'd appreciate it if you'd all respect it. And now, if you don't mind, I'd like to be alone." Turning away, he walked quickly up the stairs.

This was *not* the end. It couldn't be.

Justin took a step away from Brian. "I have to-"

"Go."

Thudding up the stairs before anyone else could, Justin reached the top in time to see the door to Vic's bedroom close. In just a few steps he was there, opening the door and stepping inside.

Sitting on the edge of his bed, Vic sighed at him. "Please leave me the fuck alone."

Not in the least bit scared, Justin closed the door behind him. "I kind of get it." Stepping forward, he moved closer until he could sit next to Vic. Vic just stared at him. "I mean, it's gotta be scary. And a lot of work. Why put yourself through that?" Flashing back to the previous night, Justin suddenly knew exactly what to say. "Last night...I almost gave up on Brian." Vic's eyed widened. "I mean, I don't know if I actually would've gone through with it - would've actually ended things," it did seem a bit too dramatic, "and Brian told me later I was just being a big drama queen." He smiled at the memory. "He's probably right. I probably would've gotten over it after a while and realised that it didn't mean things had to be over. But, for a while, I seriously thought we needed to be apart. He's..." What was the best way to describe Brian? "...stubborn, determined, can be an absolute asshole, never makes *anything* easy. Everything's a struggle with him. He's hard work and sometimes it's like banging your head against a wall," he looked at Vic. "But he loves me. And I love him. Last night, he was the one who reminded me that some things are worth fighting for. That some things *have* to be fought for, even if they are scary, or hard work, or so exhausting you pass out. Because ultimately they're worth it."

Staring at him for a while, Vic eventually produced the smallest of small smiles, one side of his mouth barely creeping up. "You really do make everything about the two of you, don't you?"

Flushing, Justin couldn't help but face the truth - he was one of those fucking annoying people who talked about nothing but their relationship. "I'm not trying to say what happened last night is anything as serious as what happened to you, Vic," he promised, "but just think about it, okay? You've always been there for me, and you don't deserve what's happening to you."

They talked for a few more minutes, catching up. Justin told him all about winning the King of Babylon competition (although he left out the part about that guy sucking Brian's dick, and the resulting fall out), and admitted that he didn't think Brian was ready to go back to Babylon on a regular basis.

Obviously appreciating not talking about what he'd been accused of, Vic was almost smiling properly by the time Justin left his room. Realising Brian was just outside - by nearly walking into him - Justin caught himself and smiled. "Hey! Where are the others?" he asked, looking around him. "I would've thought that at least Deb or Emmett would've been waiting to talk to him next."

"I threatened to get my cock out if they didn't let me go first."

He had to be bullshitting, but... "I still don't understand how that would've stopped either Debbie *or* Emmett."

Chuckling, Brian gave him a brief kiss. "So..." he said when it ended, "that was some fucking sappy speech you gave in there."

"You could hear that?" He was resolved not to get embarrassed. After last night, Brian was going to have to get used to a few things. Justin being 'sappy' sometimes was one of them.

But then if Brian had heard *everything*, he would've also heard Justin say he didn't think Brian was ready for Babylon...

"You know how fucking thin the walls are in this house," Brian retorted, knocking the knuckle of his left index finger against the wall.

"He's not the only one!" Vic's voice called out.

Huffing out a laugh, Brian stepped around him to get to the door. "See you later."

"You too," Justin said, turning and walking away, deciding to worry about Brian and Babylon later.

"Oh, and Justin?"

Pausing, he turned back. "Yeah?"

Brian was looking at him. "You are."

Huh? "I am what?"

Smiling mysteriously, Brian opened the door to Vic's room and stepped inside.

*

Justin spent the next couple of nights at Deb's - he couldn't stay away while Vic was in trouble. Brian didn't complain, and even slept over himself on Sunday night. Monday at school, Justin filled Daph in on everything she'd missed over the weekend (again, leaving out the part about that guy sucking Brian's dick, and the resulting fall out. Some things, he was discovering, he didn't want to share with Daphne). She was thrilled he'd won the competition - and totally insisted that she was coming to watch next year - but equally appalled at how Vic was being treated.

"I feel like I should send him a fruit basket or something," she said as they walked from one class to another. "Does he like kiwi fruit?"

By Tuesday Justin still didn't know for sure how Vic was going to plead. He knew Vic had definitely heard everyone else's opinion on the matter - which'd be enough to drive anyone crazy - and he didn't seem quite so absolutely determined to plead guilty, but it was hard to be sure. It was Vic's choice, of course, and whatever he did choose Justin would be there for him - he just hated the idea that some homophobic cop would get away with it.

Mel was already there by the time Justin came down for breakfast - she and Vic were due in court today. Justin had originally been surprised to learn that Vic would be going in so quickly, but Mel had explained this was just the first step. All that would happen is that the charges against Vic would be read out, and he'd enter a plea.

Frustratingly Justin had to go to school, but Vic made it clear he'd be seriously pissed if Justin skipped anyway. Wishing all of them good luck, he gave Vic a big hug, Deb a big kiss, and left for school.

Which proceeded to drag like nothing he'd ever experienced before. It was so boring, and seemed to go on *forever*, and he just wanted to know how the fuck Vic had pleaded.

When the final bell rang he bolted out of his last class, then the school, eager to get back to Deb's. He was just starting to realise that it'd make much more sense to find the nearest phone - he really needed to get his own cell - when he saw Brian leaning against the Jeep.

Justin ran towards him. "Well?!"

Brian smirked, standing away from the Jeep as he replied, "He pleaded not guilty."

"Yes!" Launching himself towards Brian, Justin laughed as he wrapped his arms around Brian's neck and pulled him down for a celebratory kiss. Fuck school and disapproving looks and homophobic jocks. Besides, Chris hadn't bothered him for ages. Maybe he'd finally decided to just leave him the fuck alone.

When the kiss ended Brian didn't let him go, looking down at him. "You've got a shift soon, right?"

"Yeah, I was gonna go to Deb's to get changed and then head right there."

Brian nodded. "I'll give you a ride. That way you can spend more time with Vic before you have to go to work."

"Thanks," Justin beamed, kissing him again.

In the Jeep, Brian explained that apparently the cop's written testimony of what happened was complete horseshit - moreso than they'd even expected. Some shit about Vic touching himself, taking his dick out and rubbing it. Vic'd been so incensed that he'd immediately pleaded not guilty.

"Just goes to show," Brian said, changing gears, "the best way to get a fag to stand up for himself is to piss him off."

Justin considered that an interesting insight into Brian's mind.

At Deb's no one escaped a hug from the owner of the house, and Justin got to hear in more detail - and with colourful language - exactly what the cop's report had said (he wasn't sure if that was legal or not, but he wasn't about to mention it to anyone).

Fucker.

Mel, obviously, was a hell of a lot more optimistic now that Vic was ready to fight, and said that she'd just had a phone call from someone that told her some pretty interesting things about the cop in question. Now she just needed to get her hands on the paperwork to prove it, and she was hoping that when they went back to court on Friday that Vic wouldn't even have to be cross-examined.

Justin visited for a while, but eventually had to get to work. Brian gave him a lift again - passing Ted, Blake and Emmett driving onto Deb's street - dropping him off near the diner and staying in the Jeep.

"I have to get back to the office to finish some work up," he said, watching as Justin climbed out of the car and turned around, holding the door open. "You coming over tonight?"

He *had* missed being in the loft the last couple of nights, and since the Vic news was looking good... "I'll probably wanna visit Vic again after work, but after that? I don't see why I can't make my way to the loft." Grinning, he closed the car door and headed into the diner.

Work was pretty good. He got decent tips and flirted with the customers, and after about three hours some guy - creepy looking but vaguely familiar - walked up to the counter.

"What can I get you?" Justin asked.

"Justin Taylor, right?"

Surprised, Justin's eyed widened. He'd seen this movie - this was where the guy served him some kind of legal paperwork. "Yeah?" he asked cautiously.

And the guy *did* hold out an A4-sized envelope. Shit!

"You were supposed to stick around after the competition to claim your prize."

Oh. Oh! This must've been Sap...somebody. "Oh. Oh, I'm sorry." When he'd got up on the stage he hadn't even been thinking about winning - just distracting Brian. He certainly hadn't even considered getting a *prize*. "I forgot about it."

The guy stared at him in obvious disbelief. "Yeah, well, lucky for you one of my dancers knew your name and knew you worked here, so, here you go," he handed over the envelope, although he didn't seem pleased about it. "Congratulations. And I'm not about to ask how old you are, so don't tell me."

Justin tried not to flush, but knew he didn't succeed. "Right. Um. Thanks."

"Whatever," Sap-whateveritwas said, turning away and leaving the diner.

Forgetting him immediately, Justin ripped open the envelope and took out the papers inside. On the top was a check made out to him for one thousand dollars.

One thousand dollars.

His family, though not exactly rich, had always been well-off. But this was more money that Justin had had in the bank since leaving home. For a while, at least, he'd be able to pay more of his own way. Grinning, he moved the check aside and stared at the A4-sized papers beneath it. A brochure, details of where he and a guest would be staying, unconfirmed but suggested dates of travel...

Holy shit. He was going to the Bahamas!

 

*

 

"Are you seriously telling me," Brian arched an eyebrow, "that it completely slipped your mind that you'd be winning a thousand bucks and a trip to the Bahamas?"

"Well...yeah," Justin confessed, starting to feel a bit stupid as he took a bottle of water out of the fridge. When he'd arrived at Brian's a few moments ago - after stopping at Deb's to see Vic again - he'd greeted him happily with the news, not noticing for a few seconds that Brian looked distinctly unimpressed. "Did *you* remember about the prizes after I won?"

"Of course I fucking did."

"Oh." Taking a sip of water, Justin put the cap back on and placed the bottle on the counter. "Well, either way," he stepped closer to Brian, wrapping his arms around his waist, "you're coming with me, right?"

"That's up to you," he said.

Typical Brian. Justin arched his own eyebrows this time, holding Brian's gaze. "Do you want to go?"

It was like pulling teeth - without drugs. "Sure," he eventually replied, coolly, "why not?"

Good enough. "Great. So we'll go." They'd work out the details later. And...shit! He was going away with *Brian*. Brian on a beach, wearing practically nothing - or, knowing Brian, nothing at all...he grinned. "In the meantime," Justin lifted up on his toes, rubbing against Brian, "it's been well over twenty-four hours since we last fucked."

"Hmm..." A smirk finally appeared on Brian's face, his hands reaching down to cup Justin's ass. "I think we can remedy that situation."

Naked and spread out across the sofa cushions in no time at all, Justin moaned as Brian thrust into him. Even after all this time Brian could still make him come undone - the right move, caress; the right words.

Inspired, Justin arched into the thrusts - fuck! - and licked his lips, moving his mouth to Brian's ear. "Sometimes, when I'm bored at school, I think about this," he paused for a particular toe-curling thrust. God. "I think about you fucking me, inside me," he closed his eyes, concentrating on how it felt now, "and it makes me so hard that I have to jerk off in the bathroom." He'd perfected the art of jerking off quietly and quickly at school.

Brian definitely liked what he was hearing, his thrusts turning rougher, harder. Throwing his head back, Justin's grin turned into a groan and his hands clung onto Brian's back, trying to find stability. It was too much for a few moments, Brian kept hitting his prostate again and again until finally Justin moaned, long and loud, as he came between them.

A few thrusts later Brian was there, body tense, stilling as his come flooded the condom; groaning until he collapsed on top of Justin.

Panting, sweaty, Justin didn't let Brian pull out of him right away - but eventually Brian insisted, if only to take off the condom. Disposing of it quickly, he settled back on top. Appreciating the warmth - with the sweat cooling now he was almost chilly - Justin wrapped both arms around him and closed his eyes.

"Don't fall asleep on me now," Brian warned.

"I won't," Justin promised, smiling. "Sometimes I just like this." With his eyes still closed Justin couldn't see Brian's expression, but he did feel a hand start playing with his hair. "So," he said, "the awards are tomorrow."

"They are indeed."

"You have your outfit all picked out?"

"I was thinking about a slinky little black number...maybe something with ruffles."

Chuckling, Justin finally re-opened his eyes to find Brian smiling down at him. "You should ask Emmett for fashion advice. I loved what you wore to David's party for Senator Baxter." He smiled at the memory - and his dick definitely liked it, too.

"Believe me, I noticed," Brian looked down between their bodies deliberately. "But," he sighed dramatically, looking back up, "as...bold as Miss Honeycutt's clothing choices can be, they're not *quite* right for the advertising crowd."

"Pity," Justin mock-pouted, sticking his bottom lip out.

Brian nibbled at it gently, which led into another kiss. "It'll be fine," he said, ending the kiss eventually, "I have the perfect suit, the perfect date-"

"Hey, I'm not gonna be there," Justin objected, teasing.

Pausing, Brian regarded him. "You know, given the choice..."

"You'd still take Cynthia," he pointed out, because it was the absolute truth. Brian could hardly take his eighteen-year-old boyfriend - especially one who was still in high school.

Brian didn't deny it. "I would. She's part of the reason I am where I am today. Of course, if I actually *told* her that..."

"Heaven forbid Brian Kinney should pay anyone a compliment."

"I pay you compliments all the time," Brian argued. "Especially your ass."

Well, that *was* true. "Yeah, but if you did that to Cynthia she'd slap you with a sexual harassment suit so fast your head would spin."

Deflated, Brian slumped down further. "I'm so fucking glad I'm not straight."

"Yeah," Justin agreed, "you've been saved from a life of chasing after women and having to buy lingerie."

"Thanks for that horrifying image," Brian retorted, "but anyway, you didn't let me finish. I have the perfect suit, the perfect date - and the perfect speech."

Huh. "You already have a speech? You're that confident you'll win?" Not that Justin thought he'd lose - he was Brian.

"Of course."

Justin didn't quite believe it. "If you were that confident about winning, you would've told everyone about it." Brian didn't mind celebrating professional accomplishment. "The only reason Daph and I know is because you were high and we were there when you opened the letter. I'd say you're playing your cards against your chest," he paused, pleased with himself. "Well?" he prompted, squeezing his arms a little tighter.

Brian huffed out an irritated breath. "You are an annoying little twat."

"Yeah, but that's not the point. Am I right?"

Hesitating, he eventually produced an answer. "I see nothing wrong with covering all the bases."

That explained having a speech ready as well as not telling anyone. And Brian couldn't have given him a less direct yes if he'd tried.

"You're going to win," Justin told him, "and when you do, I want to take you out to celebrate."

Justin could tell it surprised him - he wasn't as quick at covering up his reaction as he usually was. "You want to take me out?"

"Yeah. I'm paying. My treat." When they went out together, Brian always paid for everything. Food at the diner, drinks at Woody's, the cover charge at Babylon - not that that'd been paid much lately - and though Justin appreciated it because the money at the diner really wasn't all that great, he wanted to make amends, a little. Be the one treating Brian for once. "For once I have cash to spare."

"You should be spending your money on you. You earned it."

He'd so seen this coming. "You're right - I *did* earn it. It's mine, and I can spend however *I* want - and I want to spend at least some of it on you. Taking you out some place is spending it on me." But Brian clearly still wasn't happy, and was equally clearly about to argue again - so Justin fired off a fatal shot. "If you don't let me do this, I'll give you the whole thousand dollars and start paying you back for PIFA right now."

"Don't be ridiculous," Brian snapped. "It hasn't even cost *me* anything yet."

"So it'll be a pre-emptive move."

"Besides," Brian ignored the statement, pulling back, and they both moved until they were sitting at opposite ends of the sofa, glaring at each other, "you can't keep doing that."

"Can't keep doing what?"

"You can't keep trying to blackmail me into capitulating whenever I don't like something you're doing. First that shit with Dartmouth, now this. It won't work."

Maybe he wasn't quite as sneaky as he liked to think he was. "Well, if you just say yes then I won't have to blackmail you," he grinned innocently.

Lifting a hand to his face, Brian sighed and slumped his shoulders. "Christ."

Scooting across the sofa, Justin knelt into a cushion and brought an arm up, tugging Brian's hand away from his face. "Please," he said, "let me do this."

He'd meant to tease. Meant to gently mock and repeat some of the words that Brian had once said to him - but it came out much too seriously, surprisingly both of them. Justin realised that he really *did* want to do this, and not just because he had money. He wanted to go out with Brian, and hope that this time he didn't start having a panic attack because he was on a 'date'.

Cracking open his eyes, Brian regarded him with a lopsided almost-grin. "Fine," he promised eventually. "Just no place with a fucking Mariachi band."

Laughing, Justin threw his arms around him. Life was so much *easier* when Brian just gave in.

*

After school the next day, Justin went straight to the loft and changed out of his uniform. Brian's outfit for the event was hanging in the closet, so he inspected it closely and made sure it was perfect before starting on some homework. Apparently food was being provided at the awards, so when his stomach rumbled he started working on a meal for one - by grabbing the phone and calling for pizza.

Brian arrived not long after the delivery guy did.

"If you get grease *anywhere* on the suit I'm wearing tonight..."

"Nice to see you, too," Justin grinned, kissing him and running a tomato-sauce stained finger down the side of his face.

"Fucker," Brian laughed, smacking him on the ass and declaring his need for a shower. Eyeing what was left in the pizza box, Justin decided he could heat it up later and ran towards the bathroom.

They washed, and they cleaned, and Justin rattled on excitedly about what he thought the awards ceremony was going to be like until Brian shut him up with a tongue in his mouth and a cock in his ass.

Brian always had all the best ways of getting Justin to shut up.

Afterwards, they both got dressed - Justin in his regular clothes, Brian in his new suit. Brian played around with his hair for exactly seventeen minutes (Justin timed it) and then stepped out of the bathroom, ready to go, and asked Justin's opinion - as if he looked anything less than absolutely gorgeous.

"You look so fucking hot," he promised, almost amazed sometimes that this beautiful, fucked-up man was with him (and then he'd remember everything they'd been through, and reminded himself that Brian was lucky to be with *him*. He should probably point that out more often).

Brian was picking Cynthia up so they'd only need one car, and with him not drinking she could imbibe as much champagne as she liked - although it struck Justin, then, if Cynthia knew Brian was an alcoholic.

It was the thought of champagne that made Justin pause. "Brian?"

He checked his reflection in the full-length mirror. "Yeah?"

"Are you gonna be okay? I mean they'll have alcohol there. Probably a bar..." Normally he wouldn't have worried so much, but realistically it'd only been a few days ago that Brian had been freaking out in Babylon. The awards ceremony and Babylon were bound to be vastly different venues, of course, but Justin couldn't help but be paranoid.

"It'll be fine," Brian insisted, turning away from the mirror and towards him. "Look," hesitating, he bit the inside of his mouth and glanced away briefly, "you've always kind of made a big deal about the fact that I 'won't have to go through this alone'," he made speech marks with his fingers, although he wasn't doing it to be an asshole - Justin could tell he was just uncomfortable.

"Sure," he agreed, wondering where this was going. "And I mean it."

Brian nodded. "But you're not always there. And you won't be. Not every second of every day - and fuck, you'd probably drive me nuts if you were," he smirked. "But...yeah. You're not *always* here, so sometimes I *will* have to do shit alone. And I can. And I'll have a nice piece of blond boy ass waiting for me afterwards."

Justin tried not to sniff.

Picking his keys up from the counter, Brian gave him a goodbye kiss - full of tongue, just the way they should be - and slipped his cell phone into his pocket.

Justin didn't wish him luck. "You won't need it," he said. "And when you get back with whatever trophy you get, this piece of blond boy ass will be waiting in bed with a trophy of my own." He came out with some truly cheesy lines sometimes, but he blamed all of them on Brian's influence.

Brian liked them, at least. "Good idea. I doubt even the one I'll be bringing home will fit into that-"

"If you say huge ass..."

"-perfectly sized bubble butt."

"Better."

Grinning, Brian kissed him one more time, slid open the loft door, then stepped outside and slammed it shut behind him.

 

*

 

For a while Justin wasn't sure how to occupy himself without Brian there. That made him sound unbelievably pathetic - he'd certainly managed to occupy himself for hours on end on days when Brian had to work late - but now all he really wanted to do was hear how the awards ceremony went. Brian being Brian - which meant sometimes being an asshole - he wouldn't just call as soon as he could to let him know. No, Brian would keep him waiting, anticipating, until the man in question arrived home and could deliver the news himself.

Determined to focus on himself for a while, Justin finished up his homework...and that was as far as he got in focusing on himself. Sighing - he was beyond pathetic - Justin was suddenly inspired and picked up the phone, calling Emmett.

"Emmett Honeycutt speaking."

"Hi, Em."

"Hi, sweetie! How's things?"

"Things are good," Justin smiled, always glad to hear his voice. "I was just wondering if you had any plans. I'm staying in tonight and was wondering if you'd like to keep me company."

Emmett hmmed. "Translation: you're bored out of your fucking mind."

Laughing, Justin found himself nodding even though Em couldn't see it. "Pretty much."

"Well, Steve and I were planning on meeting up and hitting Babylon, but that won't be for hours yet. I'd love to come visit! Want me to pick anything up on the way over?"

"Just anything you think you might want," he shrugged. He already had plenty of junk food hidden away in the kitchen. "But I'm at Brian's, so I'd appreciate it if you didn't bring-"

"Any alcohol, I get it," Emmett said chirpily. "Never fear, my dear! I'm on my way! See you soon."

"'Bye, Em." Smiling, Justin ended the call and decided to re-heat what was left of his pizza.

He'd happily munched his way through the rest of it by the time Em arrived, and he immediately thrust the brochure for the vacation into his hands. Practically squealing, Em tore through the brochure, and they ended up on the sofa, talking and laughing at all the different places Justin would get to fuck, and the best ways to prevent sand from getting into certain crevices - or how to get rid of it if it did.

He and Brian would be staying in one of a series of villas owned by a gay couple. Apparently there wasn't all that much to do on that particular island, but given the fact that the Sap guy had sprung for only four days and three nights, Justin was sure he and Brian wouldn't have any trouble keeping themselves occupied.

Justin was having a really good time, and was really glad he'd invited Em over.

That, of course, was the moment Em turned serious. "Sweetie?"

Uh oh. "Yeah?"

"You know it's Brian's 30th soon, right?"

Did he ever. Neither he nor Brian had mentioned it for months. Brian was notoriously sensitive about his age - like reaching thirty was the end of the world or something, the big drama queen. It wasn't like he was turning forty. "Of course I do."

"Well..." Emmett big his lower lip. "It's just that some of the others have been planning a...a surprise party, I guess you could call it. Except they're planning on getting a coffin, and a cake in the shape of a headstone, and I think someone actually said something about seeing if they could hire out a funeral parlour and..."

By that point Justin's eyes were so wide they actually hurt, and he blinked quickly. "Holy shit, Em! They can't do that! They *know* what he's like about his age," Justin enjoyed making fun of Brian as much as anyone else - really, Brian made it so easy - but there was a line, and that was seriously crossing it.

"They're not doing it to be mean," Em promised, "or vindictive. In a strange way - and let's face it, with us strange *is* normal - it's because they care about him. Everything he's gone through this year - giving up drinking, his dad dying, getting sued by that guy...we all know how bad he is at saying how he really feels, right?" Justin nodded, frowning. "I think they thought this would be a good way to show him that they care, without being too schmaltzy for him to deal with."

Justin stared at him blankly. "By taking him to a funeral parlour? And giving him a birthday cake shaped like a headstone?"

"*I* didn't say it was a good idea. In fact, when I was talking to Mi...them earlier...fuck," he stopped, flushing, knowing he'd been caught.

Sighing, Justin flopped back against the sofa. "Michael's idea?"

Em leant back beside him. "Yes," he admitted. "But he's only really doing it because he-"

"-cares about Brian, I know," Justin sighed. Shit. Brian and Michael had been getting on fine - if a little awkwardly sometimes - ever since their reconciliation, although Justin couldn't say that he'd seen them spending a lot of time together. There was the occasional night when they met up, just the two of them, but that was pretty much it. But then things were different for both of them than they had been a year ago. Michael had David and a promotion to manager; Brian had Justin and an acknowledged drinking problem - not to mention the trauma of his father dying. Big changes for both of them.

Sitting back up, Justin got up and reached for the nearest phone. "I'm calling Michael."

"I had a feeling you might."

Ignoring the comment, Justin hit three on Brian's speed dial. After five rings Michael picked up, sounding out of breath.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Michael. It's Justin."

"Oh," he sounded justifiably surprised. "Sorry about the heavy breathing - I just got out of the shower and thought you might be David."

"David's out?"

"Out of town," Michael clarified. "Hank's parents - well, mom and stepdad - broke up. He's taking it pretty hard."

Justin knew that feeling. "That sucks."

"Yeah," Michael sighed. "Anyway, did you want something?"

Right. "Yeah, actually. I wanted to talk to you about Brian's birthday."

Michael ended up taking it pretty well and agreed not to go through with it, which was a big relief. Justin'd been worried he might have fallen back into the old routine they had in the first few months after they met - insisting that he knew Brian better than anyone else, that no one else could possibly understand him (Justin had been no better, doing everything he could to antagonise him). But things really had changed.

"I still want to do something, though," Michael insisted. "Anything. Something to celebrate the fact that he made it to thirty. Shit," he muttered, "some days when we were kids I was sure he'd never make it to eighteen."

Understanding the implication, Justin felt a little bit smaller. "Was Jack really that bad?"

There was a long silence from the other end of the phone, until Michael eventually spoke. "Brian never made it easy on himself. He antagonised the old man more than he should've." Of course he had - he was Brian. Justin closed his eyes. "But he never deserved anything that his dad ever did to him. I'm glad the fucker's dead."

Surprised at the vehemence in Michael's voice - although he really shouldn't have been; he felt the same way - Justin opened his eyes and cleared his throat. "So am I."

There was more silence after that, until Michael got things back on track by asking what else they could do for Brian's birthday. Justin suggested dinner at Deb's. It wasn't too fancy - in fact it wasn't fancy at all - but it was pretty much what they did for everyone, so it wouldn't be as if they were making a bigger deal than usual just for Brian's sake.

"The funeral thing was going to be a surprise," Michael pointed out. "How are you going to convince him to come to Ma's place?"

"Trust me," Justin grinned, "I have my ways." Besides, when he explained it was Deb's or a coffin, there'd be no contest. "Anyway, I'd better let you go."

"Yeah," Michael agreed. "You know it actually gets pretty cold in here when I'm wet and wearing nothing but a towel."

"Shit! Sorry."

"Don't worry," he laughed, obviously teasing. "This was...good. I...I'm glad you called. Justin?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm glad he has someone like you."

Justin opened his mouth to say something, anything - although he really didn't know what - when he realised Michael had already ended the call. Still stunned, he ended his side of the call and let the hand holding the phone fall to his side. Eventually putting the phone back, he turned to see Emmett standing by the end of the sofa, anxiously wringing his hands together.

"Soooo?" he asked. "How'd it go? It sounded like it went-"

"Great," Justin confirmed. "It went great."

"Well that's wonderful!" Em exclaimed, parting his hands and throwing his arms wide open - before letting them fall. "So why do you look like you just found a pubic hair in your omelette?"

Surprised into laughing, Justin shook his head and started towards the sofa. "I think Michael just gave me his blessing." He slumped back down onto the sofa, watching Emmett join him.

"To be with Brian?" he asked, propping his arm up on the back.

"Yeah."

"Well it's about time!" Em said dramatically, faking exasperation before becoming serious. "Did you need it?"

"No," he shrugged, "but it's nice to have it, all the same." He and Michael hadn't really been at each other's throats for a while, but it was still nice to know that he approved.

"Good," Emmett slid closer, turning and wrapping an arm around Justin's shoulder. "So, Brian's birthday will be dinner at Deb's instead?"

"Yeah," Justin nodded. "Much more low-key - well, as low-key as Debbie gets," he grinned.

"I don't think you could get much more *high* key than Debbie," Emmett said, and Justin couldn't help but laugh. "Now," he continued, "what shall we do next?"

One viewing of Yellow Submarine later (Emmett had confessed he'd never seen it all the way through, and Justin had insisted that they fix that problem ASAP), Emmett had to leave to meet up with Steve. They hugged and promised to see each other soon, and Emmett waved before closing the door behind him.

On the sofa again, Justin idly flicked through the stuff on TV but found nothing that held his interest. He half-heartedly tried watching one of Brian's westerns - Justin seriously didn't get the appeal - before giving up and acknowledging that he actually felt tired. Peering at the time he realised that somehow it'd already passed midnight. He'd known the awards thing could've gone on for hours - there were likely to be important contacts Brian could make - but he had been hoping he'd be home by now.

Resigning himself to falling asleep alone, Justin washed his face and brushed his teeth and stripped down to nothing. Whatever happened, he knew Brian would be waking him up when he got home.

Settling into bed, Justin pulled the covers up over his body and closed his eyes.

*

It was the feel of something soft pressing against his back that woke Justin up. He barely noticed at first, but when it happened again and again his brain took notice and brought him out of sleep.

It happened again, lower this time. It'd been happening lower and lower each time.

Lips.

Brian.

Keeping his eyes closed, Justin smiled and rolled from his side to his front, giving better access. Brian wasted no time at all in guiding Justin's thighs further apart with his hands.

He knew without a doubt that Brian had won. The firm, gentle slide of his hand against Justin's thigh left him in no doubt, and Justin's smile grew deeper.

Brian teased him for a while, his mouth and tongue running over Justin's ass, making him squirm and cry out. Fuck, that always felt fantastic, and Brian knew just how much pressure to use to drive him wild.

Making sure he was well-prepared - with the added bonus of making Justin absolutely fucking horny - Brian kept eating his ass for a while, until he finally slid a lubed finger inside. Groaning in relief, Justin pushed back against it, asking for more. Brian complied.

The sound of a condom being opened registered - Brian could do most things one-handed, especially when he brought his mouth into the equation - and the anticipation made Justin buck against the fingers in his ass. God...

Slapping his ass as punishment, Brian nonetheless withdrew his fingers and slowly replaced them with his cock. Justin tried to thrust back, tried to get more of him, *now*, but Brian had a firm hold on Justin's hips and he was very much in charge of the show.

Growling, Justin let his head fall forward to rest on his crossed forearms and waited for Brian to just fuck him already.

It wasn't long until Brian gave him what he wanted, and when Justin came it was with Brian's grunts filling his ears and his hand on his cock.

Pulling out slowly, Brian disposed of the condom somewhere but didn't leave the bed, and then helped Justin turn around. When their eyes met their arms were around each other, and Justin smiled as Brian pulled him into a kiss. Sighing happily, he revelled in the kiss - that was the only thing he missed when they fucked that way: easy access to mouths.

Eventually ending the kiss, Justin smiled up at him some more. "Congratulations, Mr Kinney," he said warmly. They were the first words either one of them had spoken since Justin had woken up.

"Why thank you, Mr Taylor," he replied just as warmly, rubbing their noses together. "And how was your evening?"

"Good," he said, "Emmett came over. We watched Yellow Submarine." Brian snorted his extreme 'surprise', and Justin chose to ignore it because of the fabulous fuck. "But tell me about your evening."

"Tomorrow," Brian promised, shifting and temporarily breaking their hold on each other until they were spooned together. "It's late, and I have work and you have school tomorrow."

He wasn't about to argue. Sometimes sex gave him tons of energy; sometimes it just made him want to sleep. This time it was definitely the latter. "Okay," he said happily, closing his eyes and tucking in closer to Brian's body. A nose nuzzled against his neck, and Justin appreciated the contact as he started to drift off again.

"Hey,"

Brian had spoken. "Hmm?"

"Just one thing."

"What's that?" he yawned.

"You ever been to New York?"

 

*

 

The next morning, Brian told him all about his evening - the clothes, the gossip, some guy who tried to fuck him ("I told him I'm not a receiver then told him to fuck off,") - as they showered and got dressed.

Not once did he mention New York.

Though Justin had been drowsy at the time, he definitely remembered Brian asking if he'd ever been. He'd visited New York City a few times when his family had still be together and - apparently - happy, but it'd been a few years since the last visit. He couldn't really say he knew it well. "Brian?"

"Yeah?" he asked, head bent down as he concentrated on his tie.

"Last night you mentioned something about New York..." It might not have piqued his curiousity usually, but the question had been such a non-sequiter - and after Justin'd said that he had been before, Brian hadn't said anything else.

"Right," Brian agreed, sounding strained. "I did. You staying here tonight?"

"Well, with Vic going back to court tomorrow I was planning on sleeping at Deb's," he explained. "But I can easily stop home before that if you wanna talk."

"Sounds good," Brian nodded firmly, finally finished with his tie. "I want your opinion on something."

Intrigued more than ever now - Brian was acting kind of...funky - Justin stepped closer to him. "You're not gonna give me any hints at all, are you?"

"No," he said, smirking, relaxing. "You'll just have to wait like a good little boy."

Oh, *bad* choice of phrase. "Hmm," Justin moved closer still, cupping Brian's dick through his pants, "I think you know better than anyone else what a *bad* little boy I am..."

He ended up being late for school, but it was worth it.

As for school and work, they were variously interesting and boring. Daph kept him amused when they had a class together; some of the customers kept him amused if they had a particularly good story to tell. When his shift finished he ventured outside and saw that Brian wasn't waiting, but that didn't worry him. Brian wasn't always there these days, and Justin found he actually kind of liked that - not that he didn't appreciate a free ride when the weather was shitty.

Fortunately the weather today wasn't too bad, and Justin decided to walk home. It only took about twenty minutes, and then he was letting himself into the building and climbing the stairs to Brian's floor. Unlocking and sliding open the door, Justin stepped in - then paused when he realised Brian had company.

Brian and Michael were sitting on the sofa together, and though they'd turned to look as he'd arrived, they were still sitting so close together that Justin could tell he was interrupting a private conversation. "Uh," he began, immediately stepping back out, "I can come back later if-"

"No," Michael interrupted, getting to his feet. "It's okay. I was just going."

Hesitating before realising Michael really meant it, Justin shrugged and stepped back in, taking his bag from his shoulder and thumping it down on the kitchen counter. Taking off his coat, he pretended not to watch as they hugged and kissed and said something to each other ("Thanks, Brian." "Anytime, Mikey.") Rustling around inside his bag for something that didn't exist, he was still by the counter when Michael walked across the loft and pulled the door open.

He hesitated by the door. "See you later, Justin."

Justin smiled brightly. "'Bye, Michael." He kept smiling until the door thudded shut, and then he lost the smile and the act and ran over to Brian, still sitting on the sofa. "Well?" he demanded, falling down next to him, the impact making Brian's body bounce up slightly from the sofa.

Brian regarded him with his usual, long-suffering why do I put up with you? expression.

Justin knew he was full of shit.

"Seems the doc has decided he needs to move to Portland to be with his kid, after all that family drama shit. He's asked Mikey to go with him."

Wow. "Big decision," he said, leaning back against the sofa, and letting his body slide until he was resting against Brian's shoulder. "I guess David really must care about him."

"You had doubts?"

Oh, like Brian never had any. He did wonder sometimes, though, exactly why Michael and David were together - but then he was sure some people thought the same about him and Brian. "I don't know," he sighed, "David just seems...controlling, sometimes. Or rather, Michael lets him be." As far as being controlling, Brian and David really weren't all that different. They both liked being in charge, deciding how and when things should happen. Luckily, that was where the similarity ended (and on a physical note, Brian was so much hotter than David).

"Maybe that's what Mikey needs," Brian shrugged, and Justin copied the movement. Maybe Brian was right. Maybe Michael liked having someone being in charge.

"I guess."

They didn't say anything for a while, leaning against each other, until Brian broke the silence.

"Actually," he began, "David moving and asking Mikey to go with him...turns out to be odd timing."

"Why's that?" Justin asked, pulling away and turning his head to frown at him.

"That thing we need to talk about..."

Ah, yeah. That infamous Thing We Need To Talk About. Justin had been thinking about it all day, wondering exactly what it was Brian needed an opinion on. "Yeah?"

Suddenly moving, Brian sat forward, leaning his arms on his knees and clasping his hands together. Whatever it was, he was clearly struggling with it. "At the awards banquet last night. The guy who presented the award - Adam Lyons. He works for an ad firm in New York, Kennedy and Collins. They're good," he paused. "Really good."

Justin sat forward and reached out a hand, touching Brian's arm. He didn't know what was going on yet, but Brian was clearly stressed out.

Brian continued. "He said...that I was wasting my time in Pittsburgh. That my career wouldn't go anywhere if I stayed here. That..." he stared down at his hands, "there was a vacancy at his office and the job was practically mine. I talked to their people today. They want me to fly in for an interview tomorrow."

His whole body turning numb, Justin's hand slipped from Brian's arm. Brian was moving to New York. Brian was moving to New York? "You're leaving?" He couldn't wrap his mind around the enormity of it. Brian not being there at the loft. Not walking into the diner and groping Justin halfway through his shift. Not fighting and fucking and wrapping up on the sofa together, asking how the fuck Bubbles was supposed to be a good name for an alleged superhero (or Blossom or Buttercup, for that matter).

Justin had considered the possibility of Brian moving to New York - but only for a split second. He'd refused to think about it.

Now he was kind of wishing he had.

Lifting his head, Brian unclasped his hands and turned towards him. "Before you queen out, there are still a lot of variables to consider. I may not like them. They may not like me. Ryder might offer me a better deal to stay. And I have things to think about here. Gus, the gang..." he stared at Justin. "Other things. But," he blew out a breath, "even if I do end up going...New York isn't that far away. Flight's only take about ninety minutes, and I'll be making more fucking money then even I'll know what to do with. There's no reason I can't fly back to Pittsburgh whenever I get some free time, or you could even fly to New York for that matter. In fact it'd be great for my frequent fl-"

Wait, wait, *what*? "You're not breaking up with me?" Justin was very much aware that he sounded like a twelve-year-old girl but, right then, *nothing* was going to stop him from sounding like a twelve-year-old girl.

Tipping his head to one side, Brian regarded him intently. Instead of answering the question directly, he surprised Justin by standing up and walking to the computer table. When he came back, he thrust a wad of papers into Justin's hands. "There is...another possibility."

Frowning down at the papers, Justin stared at them blankly. He was still in shock - Brian leaving, Brian not breaking up with him. They'd still be *together* even if they weren't together - and his brain seemed incapable of translating any kind of written word.

Still, after a few attempts he managed to figure out they'd been printed off from the computer, and each piece of paper bore a different name - some familiar, some not.

NYU Steinhardt
Tisch School of the Arts
The Art Students League of New York
The Art Institute of New York City
Barnard College, Department of Art History
The City College of New York, Department of Art

The list went on.

All teaching art. All situated in New York.

New fucking York!

"Are you...?" Dazed, he tried to say more, but his mouth seemed to have stopped working. Brian was asking him to go with him?

Staring down at him, Brian stopped biting his lip. "I know it's a lot to think about. You grew up here. Your mom and Molly are here. Your friends. And...I really don't know if I can do the twenty-four-hours-all-the-fucking-time thing. But..." he blew out a quick breath. "You not being there, at least some of the time, would be..." he searched for the right phrase, and apparently found it, "...not good."

He wanted to say yes. He wanted to jump Brian and fly to New York right then and there. But...

Brian was right. It *was* a lot to think about. He'd be giving up everything he'd ever known. "I..." he wanted to say yes. "I need to think about it."

"Sure," Brian replied immediately, although Justin thought he saw his shoulders slump. "Need a ride to Deb's?"

The rest of the evening passed in a bizarre blur. Justin wasn't quite sure he was awake.

Michael was at Deb's - apparently after leaving Brian's he'd gone straight there - and so was Mel. She had the paperwork she'd been looking for and was extremely confident about Vic's chances tomorrow, but she wasn't taking anything for granted, coaching Vic on exactly what to say if he was put up on the stand and questioned after all.

It was probably interesting, maybe even helpful, but Justin only had the vaguest awareness of what was being said at any given time. He brushed off Deb's queries by telling her he was just tired, and she told him that was what he got for letting Brian fuck him at all hours.

Michael kept looking at him strangely, though, and Justin couldn't help but think how similar their situations were. Both of them asked the same thing, given the same choice. Of course, Justin was only going to New York, and Brian was right - it wasn't *that* far from Pittsburgh. Portland might as well have been on the other side of the world in comparison.

But then he looked around at the people there - Deb and Vic, who'd taken him in and treated him like family. Mel, who'd always been good to him and had even developed into some kind of quasi-friend of Brian's. Michael, who was a good guy at heart and actually pretty funny sometimes - and New York felt like a million miles away.

It started getting late. Mel left, promising to be there tomorrow, bright and early. Michael followed soon after, expecting a phone call from David, and gave Vic a giant hug.

Justin didn't move, still squished up in the corner of Deb's sofa.

He should've known Vic would sit next to him, and - well. Maybe he had known.

"What's up, kiddo?" Nothing ever seemed to get by Vic.

Peering around to the kitchen and not seeing Deb - if he said this in front of her, there was no way it wouldn't be all across Liberty by tomorrow morning - Justin spoke quietly. "Brian got a job offer in New York. It's not a sure thing, but if he gets it..."

Understanding and sympathy flickered across Vic's face - but Justin didn't need it.

It was almost *fun*.

"He asked me to go with him."

The sympathy immediately transformed into shock, they joy. "Holy shit, kid," Vic laughed, "you did good!"

Grinning for the first time since Brian had asked, Justin flushed. It was pretty amazing, really, that the guy he'd met all those months ago on Liberty Avenue had asked him to move to New York with him.

No. *Fucking* amazing.

"I just don't know what to do!" he admitted, drawing his legs up and resting his chin on his knees.

"Well it's certainly a big decision," Vic agreed, "and one you have to make yourself. But you mind if I give you some advice anyway? You know how much I love the sound of my own voice."

"Sure," he shrugged.

"I tend to be cautious about people moving in together, because of my own experience. Roberto - my boyfriend at the time - and I rushed into it, moved in together too soon. We broke up a week after we got the place." That was kind of a depressing story, but thankfully Vic went on. "But you two? Shit, I don't think there's anything the two of you haven't struggled through together already. I'm not saying it'll be easy, because it won't. Sometimes you'll want to kill each other - even more so than usual," he grinned. "But you love him, right? And he loves you?" Justin nodded. "And you've both shown that you'd do anything for each other." It wasn't a question this time, but Justin nodded again. "And is there anything that's stopping you from coming back to Pittsburgh to visit? Or anything preventing you from studying art in New York?"

"No," Justin admitted, shaking his head.

"Good," he nodded. "Then I have just one more question for you, kiddo."

"What's that?"

Vic smiled. "What the fuck are you still doing here?"

 

*

 

The cab was taking *forever*. This was one of those times when Justin seriously regretted the fact that no one at Deb's house owned a car.

He could've walked or taken the bus to Brian's, but it'd started raining a while ago. And as much as he loved Brian, he'd still prefer to stay dry. Besides, getting a cab would be much faster - if the fucking thing ever turned up.

Pacing back and forth by the window, Justin paused every few seconds to pick up the net curtains and peer outside. He'd inevitably lower it back down in frustration, huff out an annoyed breath, and start pacing again.

"You have everything you need at Brian's for school tomorrow?" Vic checked.

"Yeah," Justin retorted, still pacing and looking.

"Uniform?"

"Yeah."

"Books?"

He gestured to his bag, resting on the sofa. "Yeah."

"Condoms?"

Pausing, Justin turned to stare at him. Realising he was joking, he managed a smile. Vic'd always been supportive and...was going back to court again tomorrow. Shit. "Vic," he stepped towards him, "are you sure you don't mind if I go? Seriously. You're back in court tomorrow and I don't want to abandon you or-"

"Justin," he interrupted, placing his hands on his shoulders, "if I had a choice between sitting here worrying about something I have no control over or having sex with Brian Kinney, which one do you think *I'd* choose?"

It was impossible not to grin. "You're the best," Justin said, leaning in for a hug.

"I know," Vic sighed heavily, "and yet somehow the studs on Liberty Avenue keep failing to notice that."

A new voice interrupted. "Everything okay?"

Pulling away from Vic, Justin looked behind him to see Deb paused on the stairs, holding on to the railing with her left hand. "Everything's great," he promised, turning back to the window to have another peek as she finished descending the stairs.

Nothing yet.

"Uh huh," Deb's voice was ripe with disbelief as she stood next to her brother, giving him an appraising look before focusing back on Justin. "You waiting for Brian?"

A beep sounded from outside. Throwing up the net curtain, Justin saw the cab pull up and grinned widely. "Not exactly." Picking up his bag and opening the front door, Justin paused and returned to kiss Vic on the side of his face. Still grinning, he grabbed the edge of his hoodie and pulled it up over his head, running out into the rain. "He's waiting for me!"

An eternity later the cab *finally* pulled up outside Brian's building. Opening the door before the car even stopped moving, Justin threw some notes towards the driver - badly - grabbed his bag and dived out of the car. He knew it was rude but he didn't fucking care. "Thanks!" he yelled as he pulled his hoodie back up, splashing along the sidewalk and letting himself into the building.

He was panting for breath by the time he reached Brian's door - he couldn't wait for the elevator; he'd done enough waiting already - and his fingers fumbled with the key before getting the fucker to work and then the door was sliding open and he was running into the loft.

"Bria-" they collided in the middle of the loft, Justin's bag thudding to the floor and his sneakers squeaking and sliding as they clung to each other in an attempt not to fall over.

When Justin was sure no one was about to land on their ass, he didn't even give Brian a chance to ask what the fuck he was doing there before he was blurting the words out.

"I don't care," he gulped for breath, staring at him. "I don't care if we're in Pittsburgh, or New York, or fucking Timbuktu. As long as I have you and my art, I don't care where the fuck I am. It's all I need." He'd had plenty of time to think about this on the way there. He'd kind of been kicking himself for leaving at all after Brian had asked - it'd been such a huge, amazing step, leaving Brian much more vulnerable than usual - and Justin had immediately gone away.

But...he had needed the time to himself, to not be influenced by Brian's presence. And though Vic had definitely helped, this was Justin's decision, through and through.

Returning the stare, Brian considered Justin's words for a long time. Finally, freeing his right hand - it'd been clamped on to Justin's side - he reached up and...pulled Justin's hoodie down.

"You look really fucking stupid with that thing still on."

Brian *so* loved him. "Brian?"

He was grinning. "Yeah, Sunshine?"

"Shut up and fuck me."

*

When Brian woke him at some hour way before he could be expected to function properly, Justin was still in such a good mood that he only grumbled for a few seconds.

"Have to go," Brian breathed by his ear.

Nodding and yawning, Justin managed to wrap an arm around Brian's neck and pull him down. The kiss was long, and deep, and just turning *really* interesting when Brian grunted and pulled away.

"Little shit," he whispered fondly. "I'll probably be back home before you are."

Nodding and releasing him, Justin closed his eyes and rolled back onto his side, smiling as he snuggled deeper under the covers. "Good luck. Love you."

A hand tugged gently on his hair. "Yeah." The hand let go, and then the mattress shifted as weight was removed. "Christ, you need a haircut."

*

Daph was convinced he was on something, despite Justin's vociferous claims otherwise. Geez, just because he was in a good mood...

Well, okay. Just because he was practically bouncing off the walls.

"Are you sure you're not on speed or something?" she asked, walking towards lunch hall. "It's not like I don't know you've taken stuff before. I've read all about amphetamines, you know - it was for this school project. Have you ever seen that 'this is your brain on drugs' thing? They crack an egg into a frying pan and-"

"Daphne, for the last time, I'm not taking any drugs!"

That shut her up. Of course, it also shut about half the lunch hall up. Flushing, Justin grabbed a tray and got in line. "I told you," he hissed, "I'm just happy." Not that he was feeling very happy right now.

"Sorry," she mumbled, reaching for an apple and adding it to her tray. "You just won't give me any details. You're all psyched about...*something*, but you can't say what." She paused, frowning. "This is like when you were hiding Brian's dri..." she stopped, making sure they didn't have an audience, "problem, just with a good thing. It's still frustrating, you know."

Justin smiled and pointed out the fries and burgers, earning himself a plateful. He shuffled along. "Look, if this works out I'll let you know. Even if it doesn't work out I'll let you know. But until then I'm trying to keep it quiet *and* trying not to jinx it."

"Since when did you become superstitious?"

"Since Brian asked me to-" he caught himself just in time, amazed at how easily the truth would've come from his lips. "So," he continued, completely ignoring the assessing stare Daph was giving him as he pretended to ponder which dessert to choose, "how's Glen?"

She hadn't mentioned the 'will you have sex with me?' thing again, and unless she did he wasn't bringing it up either.

"Fine," she said, but waited until they were sitting alone at a table before quietly confessing, "although...not very happy. I decided I wasn't ready." She was staring down at her lunch, skin flushed.

Justin bit his lower lip, worried. "If he's pressuring you-"

"He's not," her head snapped up immediately, and he knew she was telling the truth. "He's really not. He's just, you know...a horny guy."

"Yeah," Justin smiled to reassure her, opening his drink. "I know one of those."

*

Vic wasn't due to be in court until early afternoon, so it wasn't as if Justin could even find a phone during their lunch break and call to find out the news. Thankfully he and Daph had their last lesson together, and when they filed out of the building he quickly turned towards her. "Can I borrow your cell phone?"

"Sure." Digging into her bag, Daph eventually produced the phone and handed it over.

"Thanks." Dialling Deb's number, he moved further away from school and brought the phone up to his ear. Daph hovered nearby.

It was Deb who answered. He could tell because he recognised the voice, and because of what she was saying.

"THEY DROPPED ALL CHARGES!"

It was what they'd been hoping for and - lately - expecting, but relief flooded through Justin anyway. "That's terrific, Deb!"

"Hey, Sunshine! Oh, it's *wonderful*. You should've seen Mel. When she handed over the proof to that asshole's attorney...I've never been so proud! He might end up getting sued or fined for wasting everyone's time. And Senator Baxter's seeing what she can do about starting an investigation into that jerk. We can't let him keep getting away with this! And oh," she continued, and he didn't try to stop her. When Deb got excited about something - which was most of the time - it was best just to let her get on with it. "We're going to dinner tonight. *All* of us. No excuses, no backing out. If this ain't worth celebrating I don't know what the fuck is!" She took a breath. "I've got the diner covered - Rita, Kenny, and Luke have all promised to come in, so there's no reason any of us can't make it tonight. Oh, and Sunshine? If you plan on getting any time alone with Brian tonight, I suggest you go and see him now."

"He's at home?"

"Yeah, he called about half an hour ago to get the news. Said he got out of work early, so he was heading home to shower and get changed before coming over."

Brian *had* said he'd probably get home first. Now Justin had something else to worry about - well, worry about *more* - how the interview had gone. "Thanks, Deb. I'll head straight over there. What time do you want us at yours?"

"No later than six, Sunshine. And I seriously mean *no later*."

"Duly noted," he smiled. "Tell Vic how happy I am for him."

"Will do, sweetie. He's taking a shower at the moment. Probably trying to wash the whole fucking thing off him. Well," she sighed, "I've gotta go. See you soon."

"You too, Deb. 'Bye." Ending the call, he handed the phone back to Daphne, grinning. "Thanks."

"So things are good?" she checked, throwing the cell back into her bag.

"Things are great," he nodded.

"That's so cool!" she yelled, hugging him briefly. "So, you're going to Brian's now, huh?"

"Yeah."

"Big surprise," she teased, as they started walking away from school. "So, did Vic like the fruit basket?"

"He called you to thank you, didn't he?"

"Well, yeah, but he could've been lying to spare my feelings. You know what gay guys are like - they're *so* picky."

*

The shower was running when Justin entered the loft. Dumping his bag - and his clothes - on the sofa, he walked into the bathroom. Watching Brian for a few seconds, he opened the door to the shower and stepped inside.

Noticing the change in temperature or the noise, Brian turned, smiling already.

They kissed their greeting, the water soaking Justin's hair in seconds. Warm water, naked Brian...it didn't get much better than this. Sighing, he pulled back from the kiss but not from Brian.

Shaking his head, Brian tried to keep his mouth out of the water. "I was getting ready to go over to Deb's."

"I know," Justin smiled. "We have a couple of hours until she needs us."

"Oh, *do* we now?" Brian smirked. "I wonder how we'll manage to occupy ourselves until then?"

"Can't imagine," he declared, teasing. "Now, stop holding out," Justin dug his fingers into Brian's sides, having been patient long enough. "Come on - how'd it go?" He was seriously starting to get excited about the idea of moving to New York.

Brian only kept him waiting a few more seconds. "Well. It went...well. The people are smart, and working there would be great for my career. I'll probably find out on Monday."

A beaming grin spitting his face, Justin leant up to kiss him again. When that kiss ended, Brian's hand was wrapped around his cock.

"Now, turn around and bend over, Sunshine. I'd like to show you a little game called 'hide the soap'."

Justin groaned, and not just because of the cheesy line.

 

*

 

Unsurprisingly, they ended up at an Italian restaurant. It was a favourite of Vic's and Justin had never been there before.

Being the man of the hour, Vic sat at the head of the table - or really, *tables* that'd been hastily shoved together - the rest of them spread out along the sides. They all talked happily, ordering their food, and it occurred to Justin that Emmett had been right last week - there *were* a lot of couples in their group now, and they were all sitting next to each other. Mel and Linds, Michael and David, Emmett and Steve, Ted and Blake; even him and Brian. Things had changed so much since the night he'd met Brian - for everyone.

After their meals arrived, Deb stood up and lifted her glass, drawing everyone's attention.

"I'd like to make a toast to my little brother," she began, smiling at him fondly, "for being so fucking brave. For not letting that *asshole* get away with that bullshit and, hopefully, making sure he never does it again," she paused, her eyes watering. "I have never...been more fucking proud of you."

Vic smiled back, looking similarly teary eyed. "Thanks, Sis."

"C'mere you asshole!" she declared, thumping her glass down on the table and pulling him up from his chair and into a hug. When he was back in his chair they went around the table one by one, all of them congratulating him and raising their drinks.

In turn, he stood up and thanked everyone for their support - then gestured towards Mel with his wine glass.

"Melanie is the one you should be congratulating. She got my case thrown out."

She refused to take credit. "You're the one who was so brave."

"You were an inspiration," Em agreed, "the way you stood up for yourself."

Sitting back down, Vic placed his glass on the table. "Well, after that terrible story you told me about that poor man who was burried in an unmarked grave..." Justin frowned at that. He knew that Em and Vic had talked when Vic was still planning on pleading guilty, but he hadn't heard anything about a story.

Deb, apparently, had more of a clue than he did. "What did you tell him? One of your Southern Comfort horror stories?"

Vic turned to stare back at Emmett. "You mean it wasn't true?"

"All of my stories are true," Em insisted, before giving in and cracking a grin, "and if they're not, they should be." Still grinning, he bowed his head down in semi-apology, and Vic leant over to kiss it, chuckling.

"Now!" Deb said. "Let's all eat before our food gets fucking cold."

Justin tried his, and liked it a lot. Chicken Parmesan was one of his favourite dishes, although it wasn't quite as good as when Deb made it. Still, he hadn't had it for a while and he cut into it enthusiastically. "This is good," he mumbled, reaching for some water to wash down the latest mouthful. "Although it's not the same as Deb's. It's missing something." He couldn't quite place it.

"Even more fat?" Brian asked, pretending to eye Justin's plate with disgust. Brian liked to fool himself into thinking that he ate healthily. Rules about no carbs after seven - except for special occasions - ordering the occasional salad, making disparaging remarks about high-fat foods. But the truth was that Brian had a pretty lousy diet. Sure, sometimes he didn't eat all that much, but what he did eat usually wasn't all that good for him. "Christ," he continued, still staring at the plate, "you sure you got enough cheese on that thing?"

Having enough with the act, Justin put his cutlery down and stared at him. "I dare you to eat some."

Brian frowned. "What?"

"I dare you to eat some," he repeated, smirking, turning the plate around so the cutlery was closer to Brian. "Or are you scared of a little cheese?"

Brian stared right back. "If you really think that's gonna work on me-"

"Never mind," he sighed dramatically, turning the plate back and picking his cutlery up. "I should've known you wouldn't have the balls." Biting the inside of his mouth, it was all Justin could do not to grin as he cut off another piece of chicken and brought it up to his lips. He'd just taken the empty fork out of his mouth when suddenly Brian was *there*, kissing him open-mouthed. Stunned for a moment, Justin quickly relaxed his body, letting Brian steal the food out of his mouth.

It probably should've been gross, but it was totally hot.

When Brian yanked away he was chewing apparently thoughtfully. Justin was still holding his knife and fork, feeling like he'd been hit by a truck.

"Hmm," Brian began deliberately, as he 'considered' what he was tasting. "Not bad. Not bad at all. But..."

"But?"

"Well, the flavour could've been tainted by being in your mouth first. I should probably kiss you again, just to make sure."

It made absolutely no logical sense - and perfect sense to Justin. "Well," he replied, placing his cutlery on the plate with deceptive calm, turning his head towards Brian, "far be it from me to stop yo-oof."

*Yeah*.

Their mouths slid together and against each other with familiar ease, but it never got old, never got boring. Brian's hand rested on the back of his neck first, but it slid down to Justin's back, then his far shoulder. Holding on firmly, Brian hoisted Justin closer, the kiss deepening - but their positioning was awkward. Justin felt like he was about to slip from his chair, and the whole thing had been so much ridiculous *fun* that he couldn't help but start laughing.

That pretty much ended the kiss, Justin's sniggering ruining things, but he pressed his lips briefly against Brian's again a few more times between laughs, and at least Brian was grinning as stupidly as he was.

"Okay." Kiss. "We should stop now." Kiss.

"Really?" Kiss.

"Brian."

"Justin."

"Food." Kiss. "Cold."

"Justin." Kiss. "Hot."

Planting a hand on Brian's chest, Justin grinned and pushed him away. Brian's lips looked about as abused as his felt, and Justin knew without looking that everyone was staring at them. "Later."

Grunting, Brian went to kiss him again but apparently saw that he was serious, so sighed and turned back to his meal. Doing the same, Justin hoped that everyone would politely forget that anything had happened at all.

Of course, polite wasn't really a word that could be used to describe this particular group of people.

When Justin felt something soft hit his forehead, he looked down to see a crumpled up twenty dollar note resting on the table. "What's this?" he asked, picking it up and straightening it out as he looked around the table.

"Oh, honey," Em grinned, "entertainment like *that* demands a fee."

Everyone laughed. Justin blushed, but pocketed the money anyway.

Brian was offended. "We're only worth twenty bucks?"

"No," Mel retorted, "you're worth nothing. *He's* worth twenty bucks."

"Fuck you very much, Mel."

"You're welcome, asshole," she smiled.

"Well, I don't know about anyone else," Vic began, "but I consider that my reward for having to go to court at all. Karma. Life balances out, and in this case it let me see two hot guys making out. Personally, I have no objection to that." Finishing, he winked at Justin.

Most of them stopped finding them interesting after that, so Justin gratefully returned to his meal. It was practically cold by now, but he managed to finish most of it.

He and Brian didn't make another huge spectacle of themselves, but they did keep teasing each other occasionally. A nudge here, a whisper there, and it was as they were pondering desserts that Justin realised Michael was staring at them. In fact, every time he glanced over to Michael he was staring at them, as if studying them closely. Shifting in his seat and wondering what was so fucking interesting, he tried to ignore it.

Scraping back his chair, Brian stood up. "I need to take a leak."

"Christ," Mel muttered, "where the fuck did you get your manners?"

"Same place you did, my dear Melanie," he mocked, brushing by Justin and heading to the back of the restaurant.

Justin was *not* following him.

David made his move as well then, getting out of his own chair. "Actually, I have to get going, too. I'm expecting an early phone call tomorrow."

"Oh," Deb sounded disappointed. "Well, thanks for coming, honey. We appreciate it."

"Sure, Deb," he said, moving around the table to kiss the side of her face. Turning to Vic, he gave him a brief hug. "Congratulations, Vic."

"Thanks, David. See you soon."

"You too." Taking his jacket off the back of the chair, he waved one hand towards the rest of them. "'Bye."

They all mumbled their goodbyes, but Michael got to his feet and scrambled after him. "I'll see you out."

Sipping at his soda, Justin watched as David and Michael paused by the bar at the front of the restaurant. David looked like he was getting angry, and there was a pretty heated discussion until finally he turned away and stormed out of the restaurant. With everyone else engrossed in their own conversations, Justin quietly got up - if anyone noticed, they probably figured he was going to join Brian - and walked towards the bar, cautiously approaching Michael who hadn't moved at all since David had walked out.

"Michael?"

Blinking slowly, Michael turned towards him. "Yeah?" He looked kind of...lost. And sad.

"Is everything okay?"

He didn't hold anything back, looking out through the front of the restaurant again. "I told David I couldn't go to Portland with him. We broke up."

Fuck. "Shit. I'm sorry, Michael."

His response seemed almost passive. "It's okay." Then his mood changed suddenly, his head turning sharply towards Justin. "Don't tell Ma, okay? Let her and Uncle Vic have a good night. They deserve it."

"Sure," Justin nodded. "Of course. I won't say a word." Biting his lip, he frowned at Michael some more. "If you don't mind my asking, what happened?"

Michael kept staring out at the street. "You know when Brian and I had that talk, deciding to be friends again?"

"Of course," he frowned at the comment, wondering what it had to do with anything.

Michael nodded, though it mostly looked like it was to himself. "I told him he didn't need me anymore. I mean...as a friend, yeah. But...not the way we were before. Things changed. He changed."

"So did you."

"Yeah, I did," he agreed. "I have." He turned again, meeting Justin's gaze this time. "Don't fuck up, Justin. You're his only time."

Opening his mouth in surprise, Justin wasn't given a chance to verbalise anything because suddenly Brian was there, wrapping an arm around both of them.

"Sunshine and Mikey. What are you two girls whispering about over here, hmm?"

"You," Justin said truthfully, and for the first time in as long as Justin could remember, Michael wasn't looking up at Brian with badly hidden adoration. He was looking up at him like - a friend.

"Of course you are," Brian declared, "I *am* everyone's favourite topic of conversation, after all." Looking down at Justin, his good mood - obviously an act - faltered for a moment, his expression turning serious. Is he okay?

Justin nodded. He will be.

Leaning down to give Justin a kiss in acknowledgement, Brian then did the same to Michael. "Come on, boys," he ordered, "let's see if we can find a dessert that won't suddenly triple the amount of calories I've consumed today."

Michael snorted. "You know this is an Italian restaurant, right?"

"Details, Mikey," Brian pointed out, guiding them back to the table, "details."

 

*

 

Waking first the next morning, Justin stretched and yawned and looked towards Brian. He was still out cold, facing Justin, suffering from a serious case of bed head.

Brian didn't often get a chance to sleep in, due to his generally shitty sleeping habits and the fact that no one ever seemed to leave them the fuck alone, so Justin quietly climbed out of bed and into a pair of sweat pants.

As he started the coffee and got the cereal out of the cupboard, Justin starting reflecting on the dinner last night. It'd gone well - with the huge exception of Michael and David breaking up. He still didn't know why it'd actually happened. Well - that wasn't quite the truth. He guessed David had ended it after Michael had told him he couldn't go to Portland, but what Justin didn't actually know was why Michael had turned him down at all. After the three of them had returned to the table, no one had brought it up again - and Michael had disappeared pretty damn quickly after the meal had ended.

Brian could've been the reason for the decision a while ago, but Justin had definitely gotten the impression last night that Michael was finally over him.

Maybe, for once, it had nothing to do with Brian. Maybe Michael simply wasn't in love with David.

Or, maybe he was completely fucking wrong.

Analysing and figuring out Brian was enough work - he really didn't need to start doing the same for anyone else.

Finishing his breakfast, Justin rinsed out the bowl and spoon and left them to dry. Picking up his coffee, he sat by the computer and booted it up. Brian still owed him a 'date', and though neither one of them had mentioned it since Brian had won the award, Justin had every intention of collecting.

He'd realised after making Brian agree that it couldn't be a regular date. Going for a meal, to the movies; anything that was a stereotypical date situation was out of the question. Just going to see Yellow Submarine for his birthday had been traumatic enough, and Justin didn't want to freak him out too much.

Besides, he didn't really need 'romantic' dates anymore - candles and moonlight - he just wanted to spend time alone with Brian someplace fun, out of the ordinary. And be the one paying for once, of course.

So he searched for things to do in Pittsburgh. He had plenty of ideas already, but the internet certainly turned up a few places he had no idea even existed. Some Brian would absolutely refuse to go to - *if* he knew in advance. Justin decided sneakiness might be required.

Movement from the bedroom let him know Brian was up, and Justin listened as he thudded into the bathroom, pissed, and washed his hands. Thudding back out, Brian eventually emerged from the bedroom wearing only an un-buttoned pair of jeans - definitely a good look.

Justin didn't say anything, nodding when Brian grunted at him and headed straight for the coffee machine. Neither one of them were particularly happy when they first woke up. Brian in particular swore he needed that first cup of coffee to do anything (though he'd certainly fucked Justin in the morning without it often enough).

After a few minutes of shuffling around the kitchen and slurping at his drink, Brian walked over towards the computer, coffee cup in hand. "Looking at porn again?"

Smiling, Justin didn't look up, scrolling through another page. "I'm deciding where to take you."

"Where to take me?"

"Our deal. You win the Atlas Award - I take you out. My treat."

"Oh, *that* deal," he replied, as if he'd forgotten. He was fooling nobody. "You know," he drawled, "technically you're taking me to the Bahamas. You're the one who won, after all, and you're taking me along. Surely that counts."

Nice try. It *could* have counted, except Brian had already agreed to the Bahamas before they'd made the deal. "Nope. I still get to take you out somewhere else."

Sighing, Brian sipped at his coffee. "I mentioned no Mariachi band, right?"

Justin was half-tempted to book one to turn up at the loft, but Brian's mention of the Bahamas had made him realise they needed to get moving on that, too. "Speaking of the Bahamas, we should probably start planning when we're going. I'll be finishing school soon so I'll have lots of free-"

"I figured we'd go after your graduation," Brian cut in. "When I was in New York they asked about any vacation time I was planning on taking. It seemed easiest to tell them that week, so I did."

Justin looked at him. "You did, huh?"

Brian seemed to realise he wasn't impressed. "Do you have a problem with that week?"

God, Brian could be dense sometimes. "No, I don't have a problem with that week. It makes sense - celebrating the end of school. But like you said, *I* was the one who won it."

He finally got it. "I was in the middle of a fucking interview. I couldn't say 'excuse me, I need to call my fucking boyfriend and ask his opinion before I can let you know'. How the fuck would that make me look?"

Point. Justin hadn't thought about that. "Okay. We should've discussed it before. We should've realised it'd probably come up. We both screwed up."

"And you agree that you overreacted?"

Justin held tighter onto the mouse. "Maybe. And you're a controlling asshole." If he hadn't been so frustrated, he would've realised he'd set himself up - but didn't until Brian moved.

Bending at the knees, Brian lowered himself down and leant forward until his mouth was just by Justin's ear. "But I thought you *liked* me controlling your asshole, Sunshine."

Sometimes he wished Brian just *wouldn't*. "Ha ha," was the best response he could come up with, waving out his left arm and pretending he was going to whack Brian in the face with it.

"Hey!" Brian yelled, jerking away and nearly landing on his ass. "If I scald my balls with coffee, you're paying for the plastic surgery."

Justin shrugged, pretending not to care as he stared back at the monitor. "Or a thousand dollars towards it, anyway." 'Ignoring' Brian some more, he clicked on another link. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Brian struggle to his feet, then heard him sigh heavily. Determinedly focusing on nothing but the monitor, the next thing he was aware of was a coffee-free Brian leaning against him from behind, wrapping his arms around Justin's shoulders. "Bria-"

"You know," he interrupted, "looking at places in Pittsburgh is one thing. But if we're going to the Bahamas you should see if there's anything you want to do while we're there. We're only there for a few days. Plan ahead."

Justin tried not to let him off easy, but it was kind of hard when Brian was slowly squeezing his right thigh. "You're so anal."

"You love it when I'm-"

"Okay, okay, I get it," he couldn't help but grin, especially when Brian snuffed out a laugh right by his ear. "You *were* an asshole, you know."

"And you were an overreacting princess. Now," he continued, moving the hand from Justin's thigh to Justin's hand, controlling the mouse and opening up a search engine, "let's see what we can find."

The place they were staying turned out to have its own website, and though it was nothing fancy it was informative. They welcomed all kinds - gay, straight, transgender - and promised equal and excellent treatment for all. There were a few pictures that were different to the ones in the brochure, and the island they were staying on looked so fucking beautiful. Justin couldn't wait to get there.

Eventually grabbing a stool from the kitchen, Brian sat behind him and read over his shoulder. Justin looked up some basic information about the islands and then - thought it seemed kind of unlikely, given the island's sizes - Justin searched to see if there was any kind of gay nightlife.

And immediately wished he hadn't.

He clicked on each link that came up with a further growing sense of dread; the news getting worse and worse.

There were pretty broad pockets of homophobia. Although the current government - and the Prime Minister of the Bahamas himself - had made speeches reviling homophobia, the situation didn't look good. Though violence against gays was unlikely, name-calling and jeering was common towards obvious gays. Gay cruises that'd stopped at Bahamian islands for visits had been protested against by Christian preachers - no doubt the kind of idiots that gave all Christians bad names.

Sex between gays in private was legal, but if they got caught in public it was punishable by up to twenty years in prison. Straights had to face much tamer public indecency laws.

There were no laws that prevented anyone from being fired just because they were gay, and some sites recommended not visiting the Bahamas at all if you were openly gay, or at least to use extreme discretion.

Justin was horrified. "That's fucking ridiculous! Why would a *gay club* have this as a prize if the country's fucking homophobic?"

"Justin,"

"No, seriously! Explain it to me! How does that make *any* sense?"

"Jesus Christ, Babylon's run by the Sap - it doesn't fucking surprise me that he wouldn't know a good gay destination if it jumped up and bit his dick off. But fuck, it can't be that bad if this villa place welcomes gays, not to mention the fact that it's run by a couple of queers. They wouldn't still be there and set up a business if life was so fucking terrible. And truthfully, Sunshine?" he paused. "It doesn't sound all that different from where we live, away from our queer little corner of Pittsburgh. How often do we get openly up-close and personal when we don't know if we're in a fag-friendly part of town or not?"

They were all good points - and totally not what Justin wanted to hear. Pushing up to his feet - nearly bashing Brian in the legs with his chair - he stalked towards the bathroom. "I need a shower."

Justin resolved not to get disappointed when it became clear Brian wasn't going to join him, and instead tugged all his clothes off and rubbed at his body beneath the spray of the shower. He was pissed and upset and maybe overreacting, but he really wanted to fucking *do* this - go away with Brian. He didn't want anything to ruin that.

By the time he rinsed out his hair he'd calmed down a bit. Though he was still pissed in general, he knew Brian had only been trying to talk some sense into him. Out of the shower he half-heartedly dried himself off, then wrapped the towel around his waist and walked out of the bathroom.

Brian was just ending a phone call. When it was finished, he hung up and turned towards Justin.

"Okay," Justin began, "I might have overreacted."

"You?" Brian asked, mocking.

He ignored it. "And I don't care if you think this is dyke-like or not, but I had this image in my head of how it'd be when we were there. We'd be *us*, you know? And if we have to hide who we really are, that won't even be possible."

Brian pursed his lips for a while. "I called the villa place."

"You did?" He hadn't expected that, but then he'd been too wrapped up in his own head.

"Yeah - there's no time difference between the Bahamas and the Pitts," he paused, watching Justin carefully. "They said our research was pretty much right. Bahamians *can* be homophobic shits, but they can also not give a shit who you fuck. Just like any other place," Justin suspected Brian was paraphrasing. "But where we'll be staying, they really don't give a fuck. Public displays of 'affection' don't bother them. I even asked about fucking outside our villa," of course he had, "and they didn't have a problem with it. Although they did ask us not to if they had families with kids visiting at the same time."

He managed a smile. "Brian..."

"Justin," he said, "You can't always have a gay free-for-all. That's not the world that we live in. But these people don't give a shit, and they have their own beach where we can do whatever the fuck we want. Yeah, if we decide to explore further or visit other islands then we'll have to be careful. But we're only there for a few days. Even if we go nowhere at all, I'm sure we'll manage to keep ourselves entertained."

Justin wasn't quite sure how it happened but he had his arms around Brian and Brian was speaking softly but firmly.

"Don't let fucking ignorant straight people scare you away from taking what's rightfully yours."

"I'm not scared," he argued. "I'm pissed."

"Always better than scared," Brian stated, pulling away slightly. "Now go get dressed, Sunshine. We're going out."

"We are?"

"Sure. You're taking me someplace nice, remember? Or is your mind going already?"

 

*

 

"You realise I'm never going to blow you again."

Justin rolled his eyes at the statement. "You barely suck me off as it is."

"Exactly," Brian turned to face him, "you of all people know how rare and special it is that I bestow such a gift upon anyone. Now you won't be receiving any at all."

"Somehow I'll live," he retorted, and prodded Brian further into Pittsburgh Zoo. "Come on, I wanna get to the aquarium."

Justin hadn't mentioned their destination at all - despite Brian's attempts to get it out of him (using any and all means necessary - his ass was still sore) - and had simply given directions when they finally got into the Jeep. Still, somehow Brian had figured out where they were going before they even passed the first sign for the zoo.

His response had been something along the lines of, "Oh, *fuck* no."

Justin had told him to just be grateful they weren't headed for Kennywood, and if Brian hadn't been driving Justin knew he would've spent the rest of the journey doing the Brian version of a pout - folding his arms across his chest and glaring. As it was he just did the glaring, because Brian Kinney never went back on his word - no matter how much he might want to.

What Justin actually wanted to see was the new aquarium that'd been built inside the zoo. It was huge, had been open for less than a year, and Justin had never been there before. It'd been one of his original ideas, and though the internet had made him a little more aware of what was available in Pittsburgh, he'd decided to stick with his own impulse.

It was a long walk from the parking lot - up the huge elevator, through the main entrance, and then pretty much walking straight through the zoo - but the outside of the new aquarium was pretty amazing. A constructed river flowed along the front, eventually dropping off into waterfalls over what were probably fake, brown rocks. But it looked good, the water splashing into a big pool of fish.

"Remember," he told Brian as they approached the building, "if you get hungry or thirsty while we're here, don't buy anything yourself. I'm paying for everything."

"Christ," he muttered, walking through the automatic doors that led into the aquarium, "I feel like a kept boy."

"Nope," Justin insisted, grinning, "you're definitely a kept *man*."

Being an aquarium the lighting was subdued, and it took a few moments for Justin's eyes to adjust. The first tank was pretty tall - about twenty feet high - and cylindrical. According to a back-lit information panel nearby, it held tiger barbs, monodactylus' and shark-tailed distichodus'.

Frankly, Justin figured fish should have simpler names.

They moved further into the building, passing more tanks. Some were built into the walls, some stood free in the middle of the room. They didn't spend a lot of time focusing on one tank unless something particularly weird or unusual grabbed their attention.

One particular tank had a lot of kids gathered around it, and Justin managed to catch a glimpse of what had them so fascinated - a fish of pretty extraordinary colours. Justin had some vague knowledge that deep sea fish could develop bright, unusually colourful scales, but this fish looked weirder than most - it didn't look natural at all, like someone had painted it in the gaudiest colours possible.

"Figures," Brian said.

"What does?"

He smirked. "That Emmett's soul mate would turn out to be a fish."

Huffing out a laugh, Justin moved on to the next tank. Their visit ended up going well. Though it wasn't something he'd want to do every day, Justin enjoyed himself and he knew Brian didn't think it was as boring as he was pretending. The really big tanks were awe-inspiring, the Stingray Tunnel was just cool - even if it was for kids - and the main exhibits were *unbelievably* cool, especially the rainforest - a two-storey recreation of a flooded Amazon rainforest. It was way more interesting than just looking at fish in tanks.

As they kept exploring, Brian, of course, latched on to the strangest things. "What the fuck is a Macaroni Penguin? Sounds like something Gus'll make when he starts school." He'd kept his voice lower than usual because of the amount of kids around - and really, Brian had been handling the sheer number of kids pretty well - and Justin smiled as he watched the penguin in question waddle around.

"I don't know, but I'm guessing it's not actually made out of macaroni." Finding the information panel, he frowned. "It says they're called Macaroni Penguins because of their yellow head feathers." The penguins in that enclosure *did* have yellow feathers at the side of their head, as well as a creepy looking reddish-brown bill.

"Still not getting the pasta connection."

Neither was Justin, if he were honest. "Let's keep looking."

"Sure," Brian sighed. "Maybe we'll end up finding a Tagliatelle Pengui-"

And that was when it happened. When things *stopped* going well.

"Justin?"

Both of them freezing at the familiar voice, they stared at each other for a few moments before slowly turning around to face Justin's mom.

"I thought that was you!" she exclaimed happily, giving her shocked son a hug. It was only when she moved away and he felt a second person give him a hug that he realised Molly was there at all.

"Hey, Mollusk."

"Hey, Jus!"

He stared at her for a while, while Mom awkwardly said hello to Brian and Justin tried to figure out the odds of her being there on the same day at the same time. "What are you doing here, Mom?" They'd barely seen each other since she'd visited the loft and interrogated Brian over the tuition for PIFA; communicating mostly through the occasional phone call.

"Having some fun with Molly, of course," she smiled, gesturing towards Molly, who was clearly so bored out of her mind that she was of danger of falling into a coma. "With everything that's been...happening lately, it's been so stressful that I just thought it'd be good for us girls to go out and have some fun. Right, honey?" Clearly, some kind of alien life form had taken over his mother's body. "But I told you we were coming here, don't you remember? In one of our phone calls?"

So *that* was where the idea came from.

He vaguely remembered their conversation now. When Mom had mentioned she was planning on taking Molly to see the aquarium, he'd filed the idea away as something he should get around to doing at some point. "But that was weeks ago. I thought you would've gone already."

"We were planning on going last Saturday," she admitted, "but things got busy and away from me and...well, you know what it's like. Well," she continued, looking between the two of them and smiling, "as we're all here and if you haven't eaten, would you boys care to join us for lunch?"

For all of Brian's business expertise and the fact that Justin had scored 1500 on his SAT's, neither one of them could produce a good enough reason to explain exactly why they couldn't go for lunch with Justin's mom.

So they did.

*

Justin was pretty sure Brian had never imagined he'd be doing this - sitting in a restaurant at a zoo with Justin, Justin's mom, and Justin's little sister. The Taylor invasion.

It had to be pretty nightmarish and though he could tell Brian was tense, he still wasn't doing badly at all.

They ended up at the Safari Grill Restaurant, and everyone seemed grateful to have something else to focus on. By the time they all had something to eat sitting in front of them, they still hadn't said much at all.

"So," Mom began, stabbing a piece of chicken with her fork, "what made you two decide to come here today?"

The chances of Brian saying anything without being directly spoken to were slim, so Justin answered. "Neither one of us had been to the aquarium since it opened, so we just decided to check it out." A bit of a white lie, but he didn't want Mom to know that they were on a date-that-wasn't-quite-a-date that Justin was paying for.

"That's nice," she smiled again. "God, it's been ages since the last time we brought you here, sweetheart. Do you remember?"

He did. Him, Mom and a very young Molly. And Dad. "Vaguely."

"And you, Brian? When was the last time you were here?"

"At the zoo?"

"Yes. I imagine it's been a while."

He shrugged, lifting his tuna salad sandwich to his mouth. "This is my first visit," he replied, taking a big bite.

Justin had suspected as much. At least it saved him the trouble of having to weasel that information out of Brian later.

Mom was appalled. "You've...you've never been to the zoo before?"

Brian finished chewing, swallowing and took a drink of his coffee. "No."

"But what about your parents?" Shit, Justin wished Mom would just shut the fuck up. "I mean surely they must have-"

"No," he interrupted, putting his coffee back down. "They had other things to do."

Sometimes, Justin had learned, the best way to help Brian was to do nothing.

And sometimes, he needed a big kick up the ass.

"Well," Mom lifted her chin, "we'll have to do something about that."

And that was when things started getting better again.

At first Justin was worried it was going to get even worse, sidling up to Brian as Mom stormed ahead with Molly, determined to reach the next enclosure as quickly as possible. "Seriously, Brian, I really had no idea they'd be here today and I *definitely* had no idea she was going to insist that she drag you across the whole fucking zoo - or as much as she can before it closes - and-"

"Christ," he interrupted, "calm the fuck down. I can handle Mother Taylor."

"Brian!" she yelled ahead of them, waving. "Come and see the Snow Leopard!"

"Fine," he shrugged. "Don't say I didn't warn you."

It went on. And on. Every animal Mom could spot she dragged Brian towards. Justin and Molly ended up walking along behind them, which actually turned out to be a good thing because he talked to Molly more than he had in ages. She admitted that things were 'weird' now that both he and Dad weren't at home anymore, and that Mom thought she might've found a good place for the two of them to move into.

"She says I won't have to move schools," she confessed, "which I guess is good. But I'm still gonna be moving away from my friends on our street, you know? It's not fair."

Justin nodded. Part of him still missed living close to Daph. "I know it sucks, Mol. But maybe a fresh start could be good. I moved out," which was a nice way of putting it, "and I'm happier than I ever thought I would be."

She wrinkled her nose. "Only 'cause you get to do it with Brian."

Christ. "What do you know about 'doing it', anyway?" She'd made it clear in the past that she knew about sex, but she was way too young to be doing anything.

"I'm not a total idiot," she answered, one of her favourite phrases. "And anyway, Dad used to say stuff when he and Mom were arguing and they thought I was in bed."

Justin could imagine the type of 'stuff' Dad would say. "I'm happy because I get to be who I am, Molly, not because of who I fu-sleep with. Not that being with Brian isn't great. It's just not the only reason."

They were both quiet for a while. Justin assumed she was absorbing and thinking over what he'd said - and maybe she had been, but not in the way he'd anticipated.

"So how does it work?" she asked suddenly.

"How does what work?"

"You know...with guys. I mean it's not like you or Brian have the right...place."

There was no way he was having this conversation with his little sister. Not when she *was* so little. "I'll tell you when you're older."

"That's what Mom and Dad always say whenever I ask them anything," she pouted. "It's so not fair!"

God, he'd always hated it when she pouted. "Okay, okay," he paused for a while, then grinned when the answer came to mind. "I have a better idea."

"What's that?"

It'd likely end up doing serious damage to his sex life, but...

"Ask Brian."

 

*

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